Your guide to who to root for in the MLB playoffs

So the playoffs start today. Cliff Lee starts game one and CC starts game two. Old friends Ronnie Belliard, Casey Blake, Manny Ramirez and that bum Jim Thome play in the night cap. Tomorrow Victor suits up.

Oh great.

So who do I root for this post-season. Now I am not buying any new gear and jumping on a bandwagon. If this team wins I will no joy. But watching baseball is easier with a rooting interest.

Let's look at the candidates:

New York Yankees: Yes I would like to see CC win a title. But not as much as I never want ARod to win one. I hate the Yankees obviously but there was one week when I pulled for them. It was in 2001. I was caught up in the emotions of that time. I remember Jeter and Brosius hitting those home runs and thinking wow this what happens when you have ghosts on your side. It seemed ordained. I was at peace with the Yankees winning it all. So naturally the best closer in history blows a ninth inning lead and they haven't won a World Series since. Your welcome.

Boston Red Sox: Yes I would like to see Victor win a title. But not this year and not in Boston. I so sick of these guys and more importantly sick of their dirt bag fans. No way I can pull for the Red Sox.

Minnesota Twins: Did you know that Twins manager Ron Gardenhire who is universally loved every where is sort of despised by the die hard Twin fan. I guess you watch anyone manage 162 or more games a year over and over and you find something to hate. I get the Twins are a feel good story. I get they play the right way. But they play in a dome. And that dome already stole two World Series. I couldn't bear three.

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim: They lose me with the douchey name. I like Mike Scioscia but I despise the Rally Monkey more. They don't have any ex-Indians and frankly they don't have any players that inspire me to pay attention. Boring.

Philadelphia Phillies: Cliff Lee is one ex-Indian I have no real feelings for. Sure he was decent most of the time and he was excellent last year and this year but Lee wasn't really that likable. He worked hard to hide his disgust of us fans but you could see it seethe through. I don't hate him. But I don't have any Ray Bourque emotions about him winning a title now he is gone. And the Phillies won last year. Charlie Manuel winning back to back titles would just add to my misery.

St. Louis Cardinals: Mark DeRosa we hardly knew ya. I don't worship at the altar of Tony LaRussa so I have no allegiance to the Cards. Pujols is awesome but again the Cardinals just won and that is boring.

Colorado Rockies: This seems like the no-brainer right. They had the same record as the Indians when they fired their 2007 manager of the year. They rallied to make the post-season. They grind and the team of destiny. Screw Denver. That wound will never heal.

Los Angeles Dodgers: I loved Ronnie Belliard when he played for the Tribe. He jiggled and wiggled and got the job done. I grew to really respect Casey Blake. Manny is one of my all-time favorite Indians. Part of me thinks it would be cool to see Joe Torre win a title after being forced out in New York. But then they had to trade for my irrational object of hate that bum Jim Thome. I have written this before. Manny never proclaimed his loyalty to me. I knew he would follow the money. Jim lied to me. And I can't forgive that.

So to sum up. This sucks. I guess there is always beer.